- majority of the people around you don't care what you're saying to your friend/boyfriend so if you could dial it down a bit in the volume department that would be stellar.
- you chose to wear those heels, stop complaining about your feet hurting. i get that you want to look cute (and we all know that heels make your legs and butt look killer) but if you wanted to sit down at a concert go to the orchestra. or karaoke.
- get off your phone. there is literally no need for you to check your facebook or pinterest right now. and if you're talking on your phone you are completely socially inept and i want to "accidentally" bump into you so you drop it and i can "accidentally" kick it halfway across the venue. especially when you're talking during my favorite song.
- you just spilled half of your drink. i think you should stop drinking right about...now.
- you're not friends with the opening act. you just met him outside the club. girl to friend: "oh my gosh there's matt! matt? pretty sure it's matt. anyway, he's SO great. like the nicest guy ever!" STOP IT, YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HIM.
- no, don't worry, that's only the 6th time you've elbowed me...no need to apologize.
- next time you get ready please stop with just 1 or 2 sprays of your perfume. it smells really nice but we're forced to stand so we're within 6 inches of each other and holy balls it's giving me a headache.
xo
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