the dull, beat up penny.

it's 10:30pm and i'm sitting in a random bedroom in a stranger's home in north dakota. i've got a cold that makes it hard to breathe and has me hoping i don't leave snot in my elbow crook every time i sneeze. oh, and i have cramps (sorry for the overshare, i've been alone for a couple of hours).

there is actually nowhere else i'd rather be right now than in my sweats, curled up in a blanket, on my own couch, with some cookie dough ice cream.

i, no joke, just described my last sunday night to you. and while it was good great in the moment i'm sure if you had offered me the chance to go on a road trip while i was on my sofa happily expanding my waistline i woulda been like "screw this made-for-tv-movie i'm watching, let's hit the road!"

we all know that the grass really isn't greener on the other side but that doesn't stop us from wishing for other pastures.

as a self-professed dreamer (um hello, i'm an ENFP and my number one strength according to strengths finder is futuristic) being content is hard. painfully hard. i'm always thinking about the next; the next place to live, the next job to have, the next company to try and start, the next boy to fall in love with, the next vacation to take, the next.... it's never ending. it makes living in the here and now seem like a dull, beat up penny while the next seems like a shiny, new penny. and let me tell you, a cold and cramps definitely feels like a dull, beat up penny.

but both spend the same, a penny is a penny. your life is what you have right now and i'm pretty sure i read somewhere that we aren't promised tomorrow (james 4:14). it is also in a line from a top 40 song on the radio. the song is good but the book is better.

i know i've written about this before but it's because it's something i need reminding of often. i'd hoped to have a job where i would get to travel, and guess what? i do! granted, this time it's just to my neighbor state of north dakota but i've gotten to see some pretty rad places thanks to my job. even north dakota has held a few surprises!

so i need to stop living for the next. i'm definitely still going to dream (it's who i am) but i'm going to consciously try to be better at living in the moment. because at the moment i'm in my pj's in a big, comfy bed, texting my friends and family, and listening to mike birbiglia's stand-up online which is really not a bad place to be.

xo

dirty30.

today marks the day one of my longest-running friends turns 30. THIRTY.
if she's thirty that means i'm not that far behind...ugh. but this is not about me (well it kind've is, this whole blog basically is but we'll pretend like it's all about her).

i met terra at bible camp when we were both 12. we were in the same cabin. she was mostly awkward with waist-length brown hair parted squarely down the middle and tucked firmly behind her ears, was literally always wearing pants (in the summer!), and hardly said 5 words to me the entire week of camp. we maybe didn't actually become friends that week. whatever.

this is actually not from camp but basically how

i remember her from that fateful year. 

fast forward through years on staff at that same camp together, college together, countless road trips together, traveling overseas together, working jobs together, and going to more concerts than you can shake a stick at together and we arrive at her 30th birthday.

i'm not a huge birthday person but it feels like 30 deserves a party. so i was bent on making it a surprise party because it was more fun for me that way (again, most things are about me)! i facebook'd friends, her former co-workers, and some of her family. luckily, she had to work on saturday morning (i know, i'm a terrible friend for being glad my friend has to work on the weekend) so i had time to buy and deliver party favors and balloons to another guest to bring to the restaurant to get set up. it also gave me the time to make a coupon book from her dog with coupons that said things like, "this coupon good for: a dad."

so much love wrapped up in one collage!

anyway, she literally had no idea and almost teared up when we got to casa rio and saw everyone there. i was really pulling for some tears but i'm gonna pretend like she was too happy to cry. after STUFFING our faces with tex mex we watched a halloween light parade and went to a bonfire. it was a fabulous night of friends and celebrating another year of terra being in our lives!

check out casa rio if you're ever in anoka, mn! 

yeah, the pic is sideways but the food was bomb.

parade watchers. two are still rockin' the hats.

we lost some people by the time we got to the bonfire.

seriously, if anyone knows a dad for wonderdog, let me know...she's mostly gotten over her awkward phase and wears shorts when it's hot out now.

this was just because i wanted to put this on here.

cheers to 30, ter!
xo

i know it's a little early to start thinking about christmas but...

i don't blog about work much anymore. not because i don't enjoy my job (i do!) but because i work for a ministry and it feels weird to blog about it because i don't want to accidentally misrepresent it somehow.

but i'm gonna do it now. mostly 'cause i need your help.

we are currently working on the finishing touches for our christmas outreach tour called the reason. this year we are hitting 10 cities around the midwest bringing the joy and meaning of christmas to all. we're kinda like santa with the message of a baby Jesus. we've got jeremy camp and jamie grace slinging christmas cheer to all who attend. it's going to be great.

that being said, my role on the tour is volunteer coordination. i'm looking for volunteers in literally every city we are stopping in. we cannot do it without the help of volunteers, so i'm looking at you. if you live in or near one of these cities, help a girl out!

• eau claire, wi
• bellevue, ne
• orange city, ia
• bismarck, nd
• grand forks, nd
• williston, nd
• fargo, nd
• aberdeen, sd
• rochester, mn
• st paul, mn

not only will you get to be a part of a great christmas-y night, you will get in for free (and majority of the volunteer positions will allow you to catch at least part of the show), we'll feed you, and you'll feel really good about yourself for volunteering...who doesn't love being philanthropic? and if that hasn't convinced you yet, we have a lot of different types of volunteer options so there is guaranteed to be something you'd enjoy doing for a couple of hours on a cold winter's night. 

this is what i like to call a win/win. 

so while you're hot to the idea of volunteering just click this link to the volunteer page and shoot me an email. we'll have the most fun together.

xo

permanent home state love.

if you've ever been tattooed you know the rush that comes with getting some fresh ink.
it's painful. it costs a fair chunk of change. it's a permanent decision because that art is going to be on you for the rest of your life. but i swear it releases endorphins in your brain like the rush you feel after you get off a big rollercoaster.

last week i decided to show my home state a little love. i've actually been wanting to get the outline of minnesota on my body for quite some time but i finally got around to doing it (because sometimes i'm ridiculously lazy).

FAQ answers:
it's on my right side rib cage.
it's about 3.5-4 inches tall.
the tip of the state hurt the most.
yes, my bra does rub over it.
yep, i know it's forever.
yeah, the tattoo artist's hand was right next to my boob.
no, i don't plan on regretting it.
i'm minnesotan, that will always be part of my story.

if you've got any tattoos i'd love to see them and/or hear the story behind them!

xo

ENFP.

if you've read this blog for any length of time it's pretty obvious that i love music. and traveling. and my family and friends. and my roommate's dog.

one thing that you may not know about me is that i really love personality tests. and the psychology and sociology behind cults and cult leaders but that's a tale for another day. back to the personality tests, i get actual excited feelings when i hear someone else has taken the myers-briggs test or strengths finder or even if they have had someone else tell them what their spirit animal is (it's not weird, i legitimately feel joy from figuring out what a persons spirit animal is). obviously they are are never perfectly exact as we are ever evolving and changing and growing but it is so crazy how accurate they can be. 

according to the myers-briggs test (my favorite one) i am an ENFP. it basically means i am an extroverted dreamer who prefers big picture thinking as opposed to tiny details and i crave change while needing to keep my options open. in college, three of my best friends were my exact opposites (ISTJ) so that was kinda weird. or fun. or ironic. or something.

i'm strangely obsessed with being an ENFP...a couple days ago someone accurately guessed that my "type" and it made my day. i even tweeted about it. then today i ran across this article. and the whole time i was reading it i just kept thinking 'THIS IS ALL SO ME.' if you're my friend and you're reading this and you sometimes don't understand why i am the way that i am, read that article, it's basically like staring straight into my brain.
if you haven't taken any of these tests yet, you should do it! not only is it interesting to see how the different parts your personal self fits into a type but it's strangely encouraging to know that there are other people out there who process the world the same way you do.
and you should do it because i'm nosy and want to know what you are (get at me all you ISTJ's...clearly i like hanging around you.)

xo

ps. just because i know you were dying to know, my spirit animal is a unicorn.

whatta weekend.

normally i don't do a weekend recap sort of thing since that generally isn't the way i roll but you guys, this one was one for the books. i didn't travel anywhere exotic or solve world hunger or invent a device that will change the course of human history but i did get to hang out with people i love, see a band that i love, and spend almost the entirety of yesterday outdoors which i also love.

friday night i met up with a few friends at a tiny, crowded little bar for some karaoke fun. and by karaoke fun i mean we mostly just sang along as other people did karaoke but one of my friends did get up and sing jail house rock by elvis and absolutely crushed it. the drunk girls at the table next to ours kept telling him to get up and sing again.

love these people.

i completely understand if you want these to be your #squadgoals.

saturday was spent drinking coffee and taking a long walk around downtown before getting all gussied up and hitting up one of my favorite venues to see one of my favorite bands. okay, i maybe didn't get gussied but i did take a shower and lined the bottom of my eyelids for a more "evening" look so it counts.

obligatory signage shot.

the concert was the best i'd seen them play yet...i mean, i've only seen them twice before but i guess the third time was the charm. the openers were pretty decent and any time i get to see a band live that i've never seen before i'm for it.

 flor.

coin. duh.

colony house sang their entire when i was younger album save one song. and it's probably a good thing they didn't sing that one because it makes me teary and i just really hate it when strangers see me having feelings. but enough about me...the boys really showcased how talented of musicians they are without ever seeming like they were trying to prove anything. it was a shame that the pocket-sized club wasn't packed. it should have been, get your act together, twin cities.

colony house. sing it, caleb.

after two late nights out in a row i was a bit of a hurting unit on sunday morning but the promise of a warm day and the guarantee of an iced white mocha waiting for me at church i managed to drag my butt out of bed and embraced the remainder of my weekend. sunday was slow and full all at the same time...church, a four mile walk around an old neighborhood i used to live in, reading my book in the grass by the basilica (which really just made me feel like i was back in europe), and washing my sheets made our final 80 degree day of the year the best way to cap off the weekend. i realize that saying doing laundry was a great way to cap off the weekend sounds really lame but you know you love crawling into a bed with freshly washed sheets so don't even pretend like you don't.

 one of my favorite hideaways in the old 'hood.

 my reading spot.

wonderdog snoozed since he doesn't know how to read.

i love that fluffhead.

and it was good.

xo

just yes.

i posted this on my facebook yesterday almost as immediately as it popped up in my newsfeed. james bay has recently started garnering some success in the states but he's a pretty big deal in the uk. and ed sheeran is a worldwide sensation at this point. put the two of them together in cambridge and it's basically magic.

happy hump day!

xo

i love lists. and music. and music videos.

my last blog post was about t.sweezy's music video for wildest dreams. yesterday jon foreman posted that he was filming a music video in centennial park in nashville and whoever was around could come be in it (curse not living in nashy anymore!) so music videos are at the forefront of my mind.

here are 10 of my favorite music videos in no particular order. 

10. not ready to make nice- the dixie chicks

LOVE all the black and white and inkblots are fun.

9. i believe in a thing called love- the darkness

it's 80's clothing and 80's hair and so many great things came out of the 80's (me). 

8. you and i- paper route

it's a story with a twist at the end. and the song makes me swoon. 

7. stay- sugarland

so.frickin.captivating.yet.so.simple.

6. typical- mutemath

they learned THE WHOLE SONG BACKWARDS for this.

5. thinking out loud- ed sheeran

that dance. i will dance it at my wedding.

4. something like that- tim mcgraw

normally i am not a huge fan of the "live shots" videos but i cannot tell you how many times i watched this video when i was in middle school.

3. lady marmalade- christina aguilara, lil kim, mya, pink

not the greatest message in the song but love the theatrics of the video.

2. warmer- chris ayer
i think this was just because i wanted to be his friend but i used to watch this video over and over and over back in 2012. the live one take thing is cool too.

1. love addict- family force 5
still laugh watching this. dem boyz invented cray.

which vids are your favorites?!

xo

wildest dreams.

a good song is like a good book; you get lost in it, you don’t want it to end, you can listen to it on repeat like you’d re-read an old favorite. it usually gives you #allthefeels and gets stuck in your head for hours on end.

and like when a book you adore gets turned into a movie that you abhor (I really just did that for the rhyme) sometimes the music video can really kill a song that you’ve come to love.

yes, i am thinking of a specific song here, thanks for asking.

it’s taylor swift’s, wildest dreams. i know, i know, i wrote a post pre-1989 being released about taylor’s seeming demise into terrible lyrics and cookie cutter pop (and i still stand by that for songs like shake it off) but i am going to be honest here, i really like a lot of the other songs on that record. it’s got some smart writing and incredible hooks. i need to just get over the fact that taylor is living my life and give the girl her due.

anyway, i’ve had wildest dreams on loop and had heard that the music video for it was fantastic. i finally took 4 minutes and watched it. if you haven’t seen it yet: go watch it here so i don’t spoil anything for you and so you know what i’m talking about.

obviously she has money so it’s well done and everyone is all about scott eastwood (yeah that guy is clint eastwood’s son so let’s just call that being born lucky) so he’s a win and the concept of it being a movie set fits well with the story arc of the song but i just was not into it. it wasn’t even the fact that her hair looked really fake, i just had a different picture painted in my head and they didn’t match up.  at all.

i’m not entirely sure what i had pictured. maybe a clichéd love story of a couple getting together. or vignettes of people living out their wildest dreams with real footage of people climbing mountains and adopting babies and live shots from taylor’s shows. or maybe a group of friends growing up together and the inevitable change in friendship as life happens. none of those follow the song nearly as well as her video actually does but that’s how i feel. and my feelings are valid, okay?

now every time i hear the song (which is at least once on my drive to work and once on my way home and i don't exactly have a long commute) i picture taylor in what i assume is supposed to be africa making out with eastwood jr and frankly i don't care to see taylor swift making out with anyone. 

so maybe the buggles didn't lie, video killed the radio star. 

xo